Middle School Open House & Parents
5 Tips for Meeting and Talking to Teachers
Middle school open house is not the time to meet teachers. Through thoughtful and frequent communication parents can build strong relationships with teacher.
September and early October mark the time of year when parents and teachers come together for their first formal meeting. Back to school night or Open House, as some schools refer to it, is a frenzy of activity for middle school teachers and parents alike. In less than a 20-minute span of time teachers attempt to share all of the “important” information while simultaneously trying to build an open and trusting relationship with the parent group.
Parents on the other hand attend the evening in order to assess a teacher’s knowledge, professionalism and organization skills. The back-and-forth dual can only be compared to a job interview comprised of twenty or more interviewers all jockeying for a chance to ask their question of the one interviewee.
Teachers and parents often leave the school at the end of the evening no closer in their knowledge of one another than at the start of the evening. Developing a supportive relationship with your child’s middle school teacher(s) doesn’t happen at open house.
5 Tips for Connecting with Middle School Teachers
- Start Early. Don’t despair if open house has come and gone, you can still send out positive communication that is sure to connect you with your child’s teachers. Scan your child’s course syllabi for a teacher email address or contact phone number. Record all of the information in a central location for future use. Compose a letter or short voice mail message where you introduce yourself and share a short message about your enthusiasm for the school year. Your message will come as a shock to most teachers who typically receive messages at this time of the year from parents who want to complain.
- Connect often. Every 3-4 weeks send another email or leave a short voice mail (you may get a live person so plan for a short conversation) where you again express your enthusiasm and note something specific (a project, test, homework activity, etc.) that you believe sparked your child’s interest. Teachers enjoy being recognized for their effort as we all do. Unfortunately, a day with middle school children can be thankless. Imagine your child taking the time to thank a teacher or you for that matter. Middle school teachers need an occasional appreciation. Why shouldn’t it come from you?
- Problems are Challenges in Disguise. A slight shift in perception makes all the difference particularly during a frustrated phone call to a teacher about your child’s academic performance. Tip: Opt for a phone call over an email in times of distress. The likelihood of your message being misunderstood is high especially if your questions and comments are driven by frustration. During your call ask questions that help you better understand, in this case, the grading system and how your child can best achieve. Remain as objective as possible as you probe for information that will be of help to you and your child in the future. If you and your child’s teachers are working together as partners, rather than adversaries, everyone benefits, most of all--your child.
- Stop by, just not during school. Many parents have made the unsightly mistake of appearing on campus during the school day and surprising (embarrassing) their children. Plan for a time either before or after school when you have a few moments to stop by and introduce yourself. Open house, as I have noted is not the time to engage in a thoughtful discussion. Your visit to the school should be short (5 minutes). Put a face to the name that has been calling and emailing over the past months so your child’s teachers will know who their thoughtful parent supporter is.
- Ask Now. With periodic communication you will have established a solid relationship with your child’s teachers. If questions arise regarding homework due dates, troubling peer situations like bullying or an academic grade don’t hesitate to contact your child’s teachers. Ask for clarification and appreciate the thoughtful and timely response you receive. As in most relationships, professional and personal, when both parties feel appreciated for their contributions the level of effort, enthusiasm and trust flourishes.
Reading this article is a wonderful start to an incredible middle school year. Take action by communicating with your child’s teachers this week.
